I wonder if you watched Adolescence on Netflix?

I found it disturbing very moving and emotional. It is also TV at its best. (no spoilers) It opened my eyes a little to a whole world that I might have heard about in passing and showed up its link to the whole toxic world of social media (he says writing on social media :-)) What is illuminating is seeing how people comment on the program and I was surprised to find Gareth Southgate ex England Football manager commenting. Most of the comments I have read and I concede that this might just be my selective reading - has been women which is quiet right - but where are the male voices other than those toxic one's in Manosphere chat rooms?

I tend to agree with Southgate about the use of mobile phones but also men need to start to sort themselves out - to begin to challenge the toxic representations - but also to be able to start seriously questioning "what dose it mean to be a man"

Reported from the Gardian 22nd March 2025

“There’s one topic that keeps being brought to my attention. And it’s parents who keep raising it,” Southgate said. “Young men are suffering. They are feeling isolated. They’re grappling with their masculinity and with their broader place in society.”

He believes the decline in communities and a lack of mentors – or “father figures” – are causing more young men to become reluctant to talk or express their emotions.

“They spend more time online searching for direction and are falling into unhealthy alternatives like gaming, gambling and pornography,” Southgate said.

“And this void is filled by a new kind of role model who do not have their best interest at heart. These are callous, manipulative and toxic influencers, whose sole drive is for their own gain. They willingly trick young men into believing that success is measured by money or dominance, never showing emotion, and that the world – including women – is against them. They are as far away as you could possibly get from the role models our young men need in their lives.”

I think that it is right that there are some very disturbed people in our world who end up doing terrible things, there alway has been. Some in the name of what they might mistakenly believe are right. But today we all have access to a vast variety of information, ideas and other peoples views some of which are difficulty to distinguish the validity of in general society. These are sometimes run by those, who as Southgate says, people who are motivated by what ever underlying reason gives rise to narssistice drives, and do not have others care in their mind by doing so. Again this is probably true throughout history, the difference is that today such thinking is spread so quickly often to niched groups. We choose what we watch on social media and we are fed by what we see.

For myself I have realised that this was a world I had not known about until watching Adolescence and I am grateful for having watched it. For one thing it has sharpened my curiosity in the therapy room of the world of young men some of whom inevitably are strugling with this.